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I threw a party and no one came

I invited all the people I know to my party, but no one showed up.

I spent a lot of money and effort to get the invites printed.

I hired staff so everyone would be well looked after.

I got a great DJ who was spinning real vinyl. Real effin vinyl man! Cool, right?

And I sent out a party reminder the week before.

But no one showed up.

I got those little mini sandwiches and a shrimp ring! But not one of those really cheap shrimp rings, you know the ones I mean, right? I got one of the more expensive ones with like tiger shrimp or something. I hate those cheap shrimp rings. Seriously, WTF is up with those?

I cleaned the house, moved the furniture, even got little scented candles for the bathrooms.

I rented linens and glassware, which I had to pick up, took me three trips.

And I used an evite or paperless post or some online invite where ads pop up after people RSVP.

But no one showed up.

It sucks when no one shows up, especially when you do so much prep work. People don’t show up for one reason and one reason only. They don’t see the value in giving you their time and attention. Simple as that. Not showing up is saying ‘no’ and saying no is the fastest and easiest way to say ‘I don’t see any value in giving you my time or attention’.

People invite me to a party on their website by dropping invites into my inbox everyday. They invite all the people they know and nobody shows up because they fail do four things.

1. They fail to personalize their message beyond using a sales automation tool that drops in a {first name} and {company name}. They prefer to send 1000 emails with no personalization and get .01% response instead of sending 100 emails and getting 10% response.

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2. They fail to start a conversation, they don’t recognize they are talking to another human being. A good test I like to use is, are they talking at me or to me?

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3. The sender fails to read their own email (the invite to the party on their website) and ask themselves, would I respond to this? ‘Holy cow this is a long ass email, I’m rambling about shit no one really cares about. Wow, I talk a lot about my company, my product and my needs, maybe I should take another crack at this.’

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4. They fail to make the invite easy to accept, they ask for too much, too early. Imagine inviting someone to your party and ask them to come at a very specific time, oh and it’s tomorrow and by the way it’s BYOB and I need your help cleaning up after. Want to invite someone to a phone call with you, start by inviting them to your website or just start by saying hello, that might be a nice approach.

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In order to create a coalition of the willing you’ve got to create value and stop focusing on yourself. Nobody cares about you and no one wants to come to your party, or your website or your conference if you’ve not built a relationship and created value.